cool cool, here’s a scripture for you:
thou shalt not be a motherfucking bigot who hates everybody except his own breed of crazy.
lauren 3:16
Buddha (spelled correctly, you see) did walk and talk dumbass. Your analogy sucks anyway, Buddha isn’t considered a God. Self-righteous ass.
If there is a way to prove the existence of God with math, I guarantee you that it will not be with the addition and subtraction of small non-negative integers. Your math is wrong.
I like this.
50,000 / 27 / 365.25 is about 5 beers a day. This is impressive and not outside the realm of human possiblity. For once, my math verdict isn’t “your math is wrong”, but “your math is fucking awesome.”
Client: ”I want a flash on the tub saying 100% free.”
Me: “Err, you can’t say that. That means you’d have to give it away.”
Client: ”Look - It’s twice the size, so you’re getting 100% free.”
Acc handler: ”No, you see if you say 100% free—”
Client: “--look, I haven’t got time to explain this to you, just put it on.”
“100% more free” would be accurate, but “100% free” is not.
I just got an email from a relative … I don’t even … I can’t even. Can I share the rage? If you don’t want to be all ragey just scroll on by.
WOULDN’T IT BE GREAT TO TURN ON THE TV AND HEAR ANY U.S. PRESIDENT, DEMOCRAT OR REPUBLICAN, GIVE THE FOLLOWING SPEECH?
Let’s all hope it’s our next President!
’ My Fellow Americans: As you all know, the defeat of the Iraq regime has been completed.
Since Congress does not want to spend any more money on this war, our mission in Iraq is complete.
This morning I gave the order for a complete removal of all American forces from Iraq . This action will be complete within 30 days. It is now time to begin the reckoning.
Before me, I have two lists. One list contains the names of countries which have stood by our side during the Iraq conflict. This list is short . The United Kingdom , Spain , Bulgaria , Australia , and Poland are some of the countries listed there.
The other list contains every one not on the first list. Most of the world’s nations are on that list. My press secretary will be distributing copies of both lists later this evening.
Let me start by saying that effective immediately, foreign aid to those nations on List 2 ceases indefinitely. The money saved during the first year alone will pretty much pay for the costs of the Iraqi war. THEN EVERY YEAR THEREAFTER It’ll GO TO OUR SOCIAL SECURITY SYSTEM SO IT WONT GO BROKE IN 20 YEARS.
The American people are no longer going to pour money into third world Hell holes and watch those government leaders grow fat on corruption.
Need help with a famine ? Wrestling with an epidemic? Call France …
In the future, together with Congress, I will work to redirect this money toward solving the vexing social problems we still have at home. On that note, a word to terrorist organizations. Screw with us and we will hunt you down and eliminate you and all your friends from the face of the earth.
Thirsting for a gutsy country to terrorize? Try France or maybe China .
I am ordering the immediate severing of diplomatic relations with France , and Russia . Thanks for all your help, comrades. We are retiring from NATO as well.
I have instructed the Mayor of New York City to begin towing the many UN diplomatic vehicles located in Manhattan with more than two unpaid parking tickets to sites where those vehicles will be stripped, shredded and crushed. I don’t care about whatever treaty pertains to this. You creeps have tens of thousands of unpaid tickets. Pay those tickets tomorrow or watch your precious Benzes, Beamers and limos be turned over to some of the finest chop shops in the world. I love New York .
A special note to our neighbors: Canada is on List 2. Since we are likely to be seeing a lot more of each other, you folks might want to try not pissing us off for a change.
Mexico is also on List 2 Its president and his entire corrupt government really need an attitude adjustment. I will have a couple thousand extra tanks and infantry divisions sitting around. Guess where I am going to put ‘em? Yep, border security.
Oh, by the way, the United States is abrogating the NAFTA treaty - starting now.
We are tired of the one-way highway. Immediately, we’ll be drilling for oil in Alaska -which will take care of this country’s oil needs for decades to come. If you’re an environmentalist who opposes this decision, I refer you to List 2 above: pick a country and move there.
It is time for America to focus on its own welfare and its own citizens. Some will accuse us of isolationism. I answer them by saying, ‘darn tootin.’
Nearly a century of trying to help folks live a decent life around the world has only earned us the undying enmity of just about everyone on the planet.. It is time to eliminate hunger in America . It is time to eliminate homelessness in America . To the nations on List 1, a final thought. Thank you guys. We owe you and we won’t forget.
To the nations on List 2, a final thought : You might want to learn to speak Arabic.
God bless America .. Thank you and good night. ‘
If you can read this in English, thank a soldier.
(Please forward this to at least ten friends and see what happens! Let’s get this to every USA computer!)I WAS SO HAPPY 10 MINUTES AGO AND NOW I’M ALL STABBY! WANKER!
OK seriously what the fuck. I was on board for the ending-the-war part, but the part where we retire from NATO and cancel NAFTA and crushing cars if they have two tickets? What the fuck, person. What the fuck.
Original poster makes the unsourced assertion that the combined foreign aid from one year to solely the nations who did not aid the United States in its illegal and unjust war of kleptocracy and xenophobia against Iraq would more than pay for the entire Iraq war, and if discontinued indefinitely, would save Social Security from going bankrupt.
Wrong, asshole. Looks like somebody failed the shit out of story problems because they were too busy telling all of their grade-school friends about how when they grow up, they plan on being a football player for the Miami Dolphins.
In reality-land, instead of isolationist Buchanan/Teabagger-land, foreign aid makes up about 1% of the federal budget; a total of $13 billion annually and the Iraq war cost $717 billion to date. Don’t feel bad though; you were only off by a factor of 55, which is pretty good estimation skills for anybody who has fetal alcohol syndrome(too far?).
Your math is wrong.
(via makeyoubald)
this is actually a famous mathematical proof that drove more than one mathematician insane. Georg Cantor I think.
You’ll have to excuse me. My brain just exploded and I need to go get it repaired.
Oh come on people, it’s not that fucking complicated of an idea. Check it out:
I seriously doubt that this basic principle of high school physics drove Cantor, the master of the “infinities of infinities” alpha-mindfuckery any trouble.
(via domtothemoon)
That’s not how you use those operators. They’re only for use with numbers or variables standing in for numbers that are contained within either the set of all real numbers, or the set of all imaginary numbers — not that hipster bullshit where “nerds” are iconified and “math is cool” but where you don’t actual know integration from your asshole and can’t name more than three significant contributions that Euler made to math and science.
Your math is wrong.
abr:
After the 7 million tonnes are planted, they are harvested, and then they are burnt. When you burn plant matter, you release all of the carbon that was captured in their cells back into the atmosphere. Growing something and then burning it is a net-zero Carbon-dioxide event. However, all the energy you expended in running farm equipment, manufacturing and transporting cigarettes, etc, DOES have a carbon impact. Burning fossil fuels releases carbon into the environment.
Math: Better than hippies, and better than Philip Morris.
(via)
That’s not how you use any of those mathematical operators. Something tells me that the author wrote the “A+” on their own paper, immediately before giggling uncontrollably.
